Little Beauty

by PARIDOLIA

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about

little beauty silent falls

"Little beauty is right...or maybe this album should be called *very* little beauty. Can't believe stereogum chose to feature this. I guess it's like Jackson Pollock--not for everyone." -Lou Barlow

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released March 5, 2015

elisegalandethanevans

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PARIDOLIA Annandale On Hudson, New York

pareidolia (/pærɨˈdoʊliə/ parr-i-DOH-lee-ə):
the psychological phenomenon involving a vague and random stimulus (often an image or sound) being perceived as significant, a form of apophenia.

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Track Name: Violent I
our caustic minds were windowpanes
our fingers flicking cellophane
the fragile fantasies we wove
the thoughts like falling dominoes
the blackbird's song so sweet did call
its whistled edge and subtle fall
its final violence burnt insane
our minds were wilted windowpanes

we told ourselves the weather would clear
but I washed the rain down with warm beer
so I'm counting days and blowing lines
hoping what's ahead is better
than what I left behind

carousels full of empty shells
and a place drowned in the snow
see some train tracks sinking
in the city light thinking
that I've got no place to go

call again now falling to a time
when the weather wasn't cold
to a place where I don't feel old
to a place where I don't feel
old

I've got bruises reaching head to toe
yeah love will get you far, but

I'll lick my wounds with bitterness
and hope that they don't scar
I'll take apart the scarf you wove
with thread from idle hearts
and weave a noose of marigold
no you have done your part
but fall brought air
that filled my lungs
and sealed this leaky heart
Track Name: Saccharine
I am going to a place where
lettered lips erase the
ghosts of my mistakes cause
I found a mirror in a case that
told me it's okay so
follow what I say it's
not up for debate you're
worth more than you say

so simple, cyanide and saccharine
you're nimble but effeminate
it's gone to shit
the mirror made a game of it
now coldly holding anger in
you're gone again
a vision of her kissing him
or missing him or
every thought now seeping in

and momma made your bed
but there's a ringing in your head
it's more than being dead
it's more than what she said
it's something
in between
Track Name: Enough
and that was alright when
you didn't fight me
on every thing
alone in your bed

I wanted you only
now life's not so holy
just want you to hold me
so I don't feel so dead

but that's not enough
it's not enough

I held your hair
your ice cream eyes
a frail disguise
you told me lies
that's not enough

I looked outside
and saw your face
my happy place
I saw your smile
it made me cry

I saw your face
my happy place
a bitter taste
quickly erased

it's not enough
that's not enough
I wanted you
that's not enough
where did you go?
Track Name: Apple Trees
apple trees and melodies
like a far flung two piece show
you listen to this dreary rain
but take solace in what you know

all characters and phantom blurs
get lost in the undertow
a pink bellied lizard
gets caught while it slithers
and you wonder why it's cold?

no it's the facts man listen,
you can't keep kissing
a dream that's full of holes
we're not happy in this paradigm
this self-defeating little rhyme
no life's not what you chose

I said there's more to being
than briefly seeing
how your cauffers can get full
but they said look kid listen
you can't keep kissing
a dream that's full of holes

so then I turned my back
and ditched the track
these fools had proposed
I'll keep on dreaming
I said now screaming
cause holes are where life grows
Track Name: Shiver
put fire to that blackbird
first stroke is for the reverb
the next against the absurd now
I'll float until I'm nothing
trade light for heat it's climbing
that catatonic silence, yeah

a shiver blooms inside you
now thoughts pitch blank but slide through
no no you're just beginning
yeah in the end it's fitting
no no you're just beginning
yeah in the end it's fitting

put fire to that blackbird
one stroke is for the reverb
the next against absurd now
trade light for heat it's climbing
for all our sadness biting
this warmth provides a fighting chance

but for the fears that surface
you'll find yourself imperfect
you're not where you imagined
just ask yourself what happened
just ask yourself what happened
Track Name: Honey
calamity found me at a naive twenty
but I am numb on honey
it feels sweet but sticky
and I can't seem to get away

so fill my brain with apathies
like leaves on trees
and simple things
so fill my brain with apathies
like leaves on trees
and simple things

I'm scared of what I don't know
and you won't pick up the phone
my heart is beating so slow
I'm scared of what I don't know
I'm scared of being alone

I trade addictions to get through the day
I swap fixations until I get paid
I switch off vices to switch off my brain
I trade addictions to get through the day
I trade addictions no, what did you say?
Track Name: Brother
I've been trying
to think about my home
my mother's garden
and my dog's bones
I've been trying
to think about my home
about the river
and when days moved slow

I'm trying hard
to forget about
forget about
forget about
the snow
I'm trying hard
to forget about
the goddamn cold

and how it hurt
and how it hurt
and how it hurt
to move
cause I am trying
to think about my home
about my brother
and the fantasies he told

the fantasies he told me
kept me less empty
he kept me less empty
said that he loved me
he said that he loved me
and I love him too

cause when you're falling
like a stone, fucking alone
fucking alone
he was my river
carried me home
carried me home

CAUSE WHEN YOU'RE FALLING
LIKE A STONE
FUCKING ALONE
FUCKING ALONE
FUCKING ALONE
HE WAS MY RIVER
CARRIED ME HOME
CARRIED ME HOME
carried me home